


It's probably what he does best.

by CheCheCheer



Series: Immortal Idiots [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Akaashi Keiji Is So Done, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Bokuto Koutarou Being Bokuto Koutarou, Bokuto is also kind of an arsonist ngl, Chaos, Fluff, Immortals, Kuroo Tetsurou is a Little Shit, M/M, Pining, Sink faucet guy is the MVP, but in a good way, things are on fire
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-22
Updated: 2020-08-22
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:07:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,391
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26046238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CheCheCheer/pseuds/CheCheCheer
Summary: It's Bokuto's first day of community service for breaking a lot of laws trying to screw with the mortals. And it's also the first day of Akaashi overseeing said community service, thanks to one best bro Kuroo.Operation woo Akaashi is a go.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou
Series: Immortal Idiots [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1890733
Comments: 6
Kudos: 38





	It's probably what he does best.

**Author's Note:**

> For fucks sake I can't believe I based this off of this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WcYG-5b7448

Bokuto was ready. He was pumped. He was energized. Most of all, he was ready. His first day of community service for breaking a lot of laws had finally arrived. And Bokuto couldn't afford to do anything less than ace it. Because one Akaashi Keiji was accompanying him.

Bokuto probably got stars in his eyes whenever he thought about him. Most people wouldn't take a liking to their arresting officer, but here Bokuto was, head over heels. He couldn't be blamed though. Akaashi was gorgeous.

He checked himself in the mirror, double checking to make sure that he was ready. The small apartment that had been provided to him was small, but he couldn't complain. If he was going to be stuck in the immortals city for an unspecified amount of time, he was glad he had a home base of sorts.

It had only been a few days since the trial, a few days of Akaashi getting him settled, a few days of flagging down Kuroo for drinks, and a few days of pining. Bokuto was done with the waiting. He was itching for action.

So he was going to impress Akaashi with his amazing community service skills.

His first task was easy, as Akaashi had explained to him the day before. A charity event was being held downtown, and Bokuto was to help with the cooking. Which was perfect, because cooking was what Bokuto did best.

Well a certain kind of cooking anyways. He’d been roaming the world for a long time, and he’d picked up a lot of things along the way. He’d tried to get good at cooking several times, but it had never really clicked for him. The process was too tedious, there were too many steps, there always seemed to be something. Except for this.

Some 400 years ago, while wandering around Europe, Bokuto had picked up this incredible soup recipe from some traveling frenchman. It was Bokuto’s go to dish, the flavors wonderful, and the process easy to boot. He just had to toss everything in a pot and let it stew.

It was probably what he did best.

So he was going to use his soup cooking skills to impress Akaashi. Bokuto nodded to his reflection in the mirror, a silent peptalk ringing in his mind. Alright, I can do this!

Bokuto startled as the doorbell started to ring, echoing through the space.

“Coming!” He shouted, throwing his shoes on and throwing open the door. Akaashi stood there, silently watching as Bokuto finished tying his shoelaces. It was a real struggle not to stare. Akaashi looked as dashing as ever, in a teal shirt, the long sleeves rolled up to his elbows and skinny jeans, disappearing into shiny combat boots. He had a brown leather backpack sitting low on his hips, black wide framed glasses perched on his nose. And- Bokuto could hardly believe his eyes- a sparkly teal hair clip pinning his hair out of the way.

Someone needed to shoot Bokuto where he stood, because he was about to die on the spot. Immortal or not.

“Are you ready to go?” Akaashi demanded as Bokuto straightened out, his hightops freshly tied. 

Bokuto nodded enthusiastically, not trusting his voice. Wordlessly, Akaashi turned on his heel and started down the hall to the elevator and Bokuto followed after on autopilot. His brain was far too occupied with thoughts of how his red varsity jacket complemented Akaashi’s outfit well. 

The immortals city wasn't all that different from a regular city (save for a few safety violations- safety wasn't really a priority when you couldn't be killed). As such, downtown was only a brief subway ride away. Bokuto did appreciate how the immortals tried to keep their city modern- it made it easy for people who had been wandering the wider world like him to adjust.

When they got to the pavilion Akaashi ushered him to where he would be working. The entire space was wide and open, mostly outdoors with tarps providing shade. A stage was set up in front of everything, where singers and the likes would be performing. It was like a volunteer concert Bokuto was told, to raise money to go towards some mortal charity the immortals were particularly fond of. 

They didn't stay outside for long, Akaashi bringing him off to some separate area. It was filled with tables, and an enclosed space with an open wall sheltered an outdoor kitchen from the heat. Around them, people who were volunteering to get the event ready were bustling about, readying the tables, stocking the fridge, sweeping the stage.

“This is where you’ll be working.” Akaashi informed him, sounding very formal as he launched into his ‘professional mode’. “We don't really have a set menu, so you can kinda cook whatever.”

“Perfect! Are you gonna help me ’Kaashi?” Bokuto asked hopefully.

Akaashi’s eyes narrowed in distaste. “I’m here to supervise you, not cook. But I will be around the kitchen.”

“Okay!” That was good enough for Bokuto.  
Without further delay, he hurried into the kitchen, surveying what he had to work with. It was a fairly normal setup, not spectacular, but pretty good as far as outdoor charity event kitchens go. There was a sleek fridge tucked to the side, and Bokuto ruffled through it, successfully finding everything he would need.

Dumping his ingredients onto the counter, he scrounged around for a huge pot. When he said he just had to toss everything in a pot and let it stew he wasn't kidding. As he began the process of cutting everything up, he found his eyes wandering over the pavilion seeking out Akaashi.

When he finally found him, Bokuto was pleasantly surprised to see he wasn't on his own. Akaashi was out near the tables and Kuroo had shown up in the time Bokuto had been distracted. Kuroo’s signature smirk was firmly in place, and Akaashi seemed to be glaring at him in the same uninterested manner as always. 

Sometimes Bokuto wondered if the majority of Akaashi’s hostility tword’s Kuroo came from the sole fact he assigned Akaashi to oversee Bokuto’s community service.

Didn't matter now though! Bokuto had a mission, so he turned back to his cooking feeling more determined than before. The chopping was done quickly, even with the large amount Bokuto was making, and he poured everything into a pot. 

Clicking on the burner, Bokuto nodded to himself for a job well done. Now that he had a while before he would need to return he wandered out of the kitchen to where Kuroo seemed to be attempting to socialize with Akaashi, and where Akaashi was stubbornly ignoring him.

“Hey Hey Hey!” He greeted, plopping down on the empty chair. 

“Well if it isn't Bokuto.” Kuroo remarked. “I was wondering when you’d make your appearance.”

“You knew he was in the kitchen.” Akaashi deadpanned. “Stop trying to sound cool.”

“You wound me.” Kuroo protested, though Bokuto noted he didn't look very scandalized. “Anyway, what are you cooking up?”

“My world class soup!” Bokuto announced, feeling very proud of himself. “It will be the best thing you’ve ever tasted!”

“Woooow. How long is that going to take?” Akaashi questioned even though he looked like he could care less about the state of Bokuto’s soup.

Before Bokuto could answer, he was met with shrieking from the kitchen. “WHO LEFT THE BURNER ON?”

The trio all whipped their heads about, towards the kitchen where a fire had started to ridley spread on the counter, consuming all the random ingredients put out by people preparing food.

“Oh no.” Bokuto muttered.

“Was it you?” Akaashi demanded in a panic, glaring at him.

“Uh… yeah.”

Beside him, Kuroo burst into hysterics. 

“Go fix what you’ve done!” Akaashi demanded, and he furiously pointed towards the kitchen like it had personally wronged him.

Bokuto didn't need to be told twice. He leapt from the table, and hurried off towards the kitchen, plunging straight in like the fire wasn't there. It licked his skin with its uncomfortable heat, but refused to burn him. Perks of being an immortal. He could charge straight into a raging inferno and not get so much as a sunburn. 

His clothes were not as fortunate, however, so he took care not to go straight into the thick of things. Others had flocked to the kitchen as well, and someone had turned the sink faucet on and was brandishing it like a hose to beat the flames back.

Making his way to the back, Bokuto was able to find the source of the problem easy enough. His pot sat in the back, smoking hot, and Bokuto could see an overturned jug of oil he’d forgotten was over there. Waaay closer to the burner than was good for preventing fires. 

Bokuto rolled up his sleeves, and plunged his hands right in. He flicked off the burner, before grabbing the pot and hurrying it out of the kitchen, the last whispers of flame still clinging to it. Without any better ideas, Bokuto carried the pot over and dumped it on his table.

“God!” Akaashi yelped as the pot was slammed down. “Could you be more careful?”

“Sorry Akaashi.” Bokuto replied. 

“Aww, I bet your soup is burned to all hell.” Kuroo remarked, staring at the burning pot with amusement in his eye. 

Bokuto peered into the pot. “Hey, it actually doesn't look that bad! I bet we can serve it!”  
“Serve it?” Akaashi demanded. “It was just the cause of a fire!” 

“A fire that’s been put out.” Kuroo gestured to the kitchen, where sure enough, the sink faucet guy had won his battle against the flames.

Bokuto glanced around. It was getting close to start time, and people had already started to arrive and swarm the pavilion. “Yeah, lets serve!” He decided.

“Oh my god…” Akaashi sighed, and Bokuto sprinted back to the kitchen to find the cart with all the bowls and serving ware. Once he found it he wasted no time in wheeling it back over, and set to work.

“We need to drum up attention.” Kuroo decided, fetching the charity donation box from the cart and setting it up. “You figure something out Akaashi.”

Akaashi grumbled something under his breath about how Kuroo was the most insufferable person he’d ever had to deal with. 

Kuroo smirked. “Don’t tell me you can’t do it?”

Akaashi froze, glaring up at him. It was as if something changed in his eyes. He set his jaw, and stomped off to the stage.

Bokuto watched in amazement as he dashed up the steps, shoving aside the person who was going to go on stage. He clomped his way over to the microphone, and inhaled a huge breath.

“WOULD ANYONE LIKE SOME SOUP?” He screamed, and the sound screeched through the pavilion. All eyes turned to Akaashi, and he wordlessly pointed over to Bokuto and Kuroo’s impromptu soup serving station. Then without another word, he stomped off the stage and back over.

“Don’t tell me what I can’t do Kuroo.” Akaashi huffed, returning to his seat.

“Woah.” Bokuto breathed. “Incredible.”

Akaashi’s display had definitely attracted some new people to their stand. Swarms were coming over, leaving tipps and taking bowls, and Bokuto and Kuroo worked together to serve them up. It was a good thing Bokuto made a ridiculously huge pot.

“We should take this to the kitchen.” Kuroo remarked, as their supply of bowls started to dwindle, and along with it the crowd. “When more people come we’ll have supplies.”

“Got it!” Bokuto grabbed the pot, and began to lug it back to the kitchen, teetering dangerously as he went. Less soup in the pot meant that what was in there swished with every step and threw him off balance, so oddly enough it was harder to carry than when it was full.

“Be careful!” Akaashi warned. 

“Relax Akaashi, I got this! This is probably what I do best.” Bokuto spun around to face him. 

That was a mistake.

The sudden movement sent the pot flying in one direction, and Bokuto in another, the liquid inside thrashing. The extra movement caused Bokuto to lose his grip on the pot and the whole thing came toppling out of his hands, splattering onto the concrete.

It was a mess. The force of the crash left the soup splattering far and wide.

Akaashi stared with wide eyes. “Oh no…”

Kuroo was laughing hysterically again, not seemin nearly as bothered.

“This is fine!” Bokuto exclaimed. “It’s fine! We can use fire to clean it up!”

“wHAT?”

Bokuto was already dashing off to the kitchen. He grabbed a wooden spoon and hurriedly doused it in the oil still sitting on the counter, then turned the burner on and plunged it in. 

The spoon lit up immediately, and soon Bokuto had a fire stick of destruction in his hands. That was so clever. He was so clever. There was no way Akaashi wouldn't be impressed.

He grabbed the oil container and rushed back over, careful not to blow out his stick.

Before anyone could stop him, he dumped the oil over the soup, and tossed the fire stick onto the mess. 

It lit up like a puddle of gasoline. 

Akaashi shrieked. “ARE YOU A FUCKING ARSONIST?”

“No, I’m a genius!”

The fire rose higher and higher as the soup was consumed.

“Look!” Bokuto gestured towards his creation. “Soon the soup will be consumed, and we can just put the fire out! Or better! We can use it to cook MORE soup superfast! It worked last time!”

Kuroo gasped for breath. “OH MY GOD YOUR THE BEST PERSON IN EXISTENCE!” He screamed through fits of laughter. 

The fire had attracted the attention of nearly everyone in the pavilion, which was saying a lot as the event was now in full swing. From the kitchen, the faucet sink guy tried in vain to make the faucet extend far enough to reach the fire. It was chaos. And chaos was Bokuto’s jam.

“For fucks sake!” Akaashi exclaimed. “Someone call the fire department.”

_(Explaining to the fire department why a bucket of soup had turned into a raging fire was an… interesting conversation. Bokuto was assigned more community service as punishment. This time not involving a kitchen. And yes. Kuroo made sure Akaashi had to oversee it.)_

**Author's Note:**

> Uhh so I have a twitter now and I'm gunna draw Akaashi in his outfit and post it over there if you wanna pop by. I'll be screaming about Haikyuu and sharing art so do follow if you'd like to see that kinda thing.  
> https://twitter.com/CheeCheCheer
> 
> Akaashi doesn't like Kuroo because everytime they play Mario cart together Kuroo waits till he's in first and throws blue shells at him.


End file.
